My Abilities

Most of my life I have felt like the odd man out, like I didn't quite belong. I couldn't seem to relate to people the way others around me could.  Even as a child I felt I felt distant, unlike everyone else. I felt older that my physical years. I sensed and talked to spirits. I felt them round me, I even had a playmate as a child that no one other than I could see. But I think that growing up in a strict catholic home with a mother who was a Nun before she married my father. We didn't talk about spirits. I dont know if it was my mother or my father who either saw spirits or were able to sense them as I do.  It wasnt until a few years back talking to my brother that I learned that he saw spirits too. So once again my family is great at keeping secrets.

So now here I am in my 40's trying to understand this gift I have been given, what do I do with it? how do I use it?  How do I relearn all the things that as a child came natural? The seeing and speaking to spirits as a child is as natural as drawing breath. Yet as I grew older in a society that pushed those things aside, told us that they were evil if we chose to worship a male and a female entity. Once I learned about the God and The Goddess and Paganism I finally began to feel things fall into place. I have been reconnecting with the gifts I have been given. You see I am an Empath and a Clairsentience. To explain what that means. An Empath is in short a sponge, they soak up everyones emotions and feelings. You find yourself battling with all kinds of emotions that sometimes will hit you out of no where, And that is the hardest part is separating your feelings from the what others are feeling.  And being a Clairsentience is a very heightened form of being an Empath. Its the ability to feel the past, present and sometimes the future of a building, homes and public places. For as long as I can remember I would walk into certain places and just get this overwhelming sense of a presence other than the ones I could see. For most of my life I considered these to just be panic attacks. I don't like being somewhere with a large group of people.  I tend to shut down as it is very overwhelming for me.

With the help of some wonderful people I have met in person and those I have meet through an online support group, I am slowly learning how to deal with these things. I am getting better at shielding. Which in short  means putting up a physic and emotional wall around myself so that I am not as affect by others feeling and emotions. I still don't like being in certain social settings. But I am getting better. Everyday is a learning experience. But I continue to push ahead.  I take things one day at a time.

Mexico 2014

Hola My Friends!!

Well Dan and I finally got to take another international vacation! And let me tell you this was long overdue! With working 12-14 hour days 5 days a week for the last year and a half I really needed some time away. And Dan works so hard all the time he deserved this time away! And thanks to Dan's wonderful Aunt and Uncle, which by the way we happen to just Adore! Two of the most loving, giving and fun people I have ever met! We don't get to spend as much time with them as we would like. But we deeply cherish the times that we have together. They are always filled with laughter, and life lessons. 

They have a beautiful time share down in Ixtapa, Mexico. And they have been telling us for years that we should come down. Well, this year we finally just did it! Just cost us our airfare and spending money. And I can not tell you just how beautiful this place is! We spent most of our time on the beach enjoying cold beers and a beautiful view. The people were so kind and generous.  It was beautiful. 

When my Mom passed I swore that anytime we went somewhere that they had never been I would take some of their ashes with me and spread them. I did just that on this trip. I went out in the ocean as far as I felt comfortable and spread their ashes in the sea. I am sure that by now they have been all over, the ocean tide carrying them to different places that they never thought they would see. I hope to continue this tradition and take their ashes to many more place that money allows us to travel.

I have beautiful memories of our time in Mexico and the amazing people we shared it with. We are hoping to take another trip to Europe some time in the next couple of years.

We will just have to wait and see what the Gods have in store of us.